Thanks for calling BT support. Is there anything else I can help you with?

Yes there is, Im disconnect my service today, as your now in breach of your quality of service terms, and are breaching my privacy by listening in on my comunications. Ill leave your equipment on the front steps for you to pickup, and thanks for answering my call, have a nice day.

I still say paying the bill with a cheque with your signature/account details blanked out is a good answer, when they say they cant cash it, say "Sorry but I dont support that type of problem, thanks for calling. Is there anything else I can help you with?"