Alternatively:
Code:
  var %r = $rand(1,3)
  if (%r == 1) var %msg = Message one.
  if (%r == 2) var %msg = Message two.
  if (%r == 3) var %msg = Message three.

or
Code:
  var %msg = $gettok( $&
    Message one.@ $&
    Message two.@ $&
    Message three. $&
    , $rand(1,3) $&
    , $asc(@) $&
  )

Well. At least I won lunch.
Good philosophy, see good in bad, I like!