You cant be helped, you refuse to listen to possable solutions, denying them out of hand based on shakey logic. Just becuase some aplications well work fine does not mean all aplications well work fine, some aplications requerer NO port forwards the ones you specied dont, i know becuase i have had them runing and i dont have any setup for them, and the updater is just a web/ftp download whcih is even simplier. So saying "the bridge is not out, becuase i can still phone people on the other side of the river" doesnt really proof the bridge is not out.
