Ether you ask a friend that have a bouncer and V-Hosts on a linux computer, ask him if you can get access to a bouncer and the V-Hosts.. if thats not possible you can rent a shell that suport it, if you rent a shell from som of the big shell providers they can help you with the hosts.. and as the note abow my sugest, then you can buy your own doamin and get a IP/DNS that can resolve to it..

if ($me != tired) { return } | else { echo -a Get a pot of coffee now $+($me,.) }