how can i write to a mysql db using sockets?

Do you mean you want to communicate with a MySQL database? Use mysql.dll, it's available on mircscripts.org.

If you mean you want to create an actual SQL database with mIRC scripting then sorry but that's a bad idea. It would be ridiculous to try it even if you were an expert on the subject (which by asking this very question I don't think you are). If you ever got anywhere on it it would still be 99% unuseable and/or impractical.

commmunicate? im trying to wrtie to one...so i should use the dll?

No. Read my second paragraph.

The MySQL protocol is complex and some features (such as compression and encryption) simply can not be implemented through an mIRC script. I'd suggest you use the mysql.dll (or whatever it's called) it's a much better alternative.

sql is so complex, windows has its own library for managing the sockets. >:F

*ahem*
You have a hell of a lot of alternatives here.
A) mircscripts.org -> mysql socket script. It works via signals but is slow slow slow!
B) mysql.dll on mircscripts.org -> Works fine; but not with mysql 4.1.0 or greater I've found
C) A COM Object -> there are a few out there, but many are under development so are buggy; or return a resultset as an array of result objects; which mirc can't deal with.
You can work via vbscript or whatever; and that has the advantage of running seperately from mirc (so it doesn't freeze up).
D) myODBC + COM object -> Its slow but allows you to read/write from/to any odbc database.

Find the com objects with google, or mysql.com

MySQL isn't ODBC by default, is it?

sadly no; you need to play around with myODBC.