I tried turning on dcc on send request auto get file and if file exists ask, the turned on trusted
check mark in limit auto get ti trusted users
show get dialog for non-trusted users

i entered john

and john cant dcc me automaticaly a dialog box pops up to accept the dcc.

Any suggestions?

I tried adding wildcards like @john and john*.* etc

yes in trusted box type a number say 40 then guser 40 $nick ($nick being the nickname)

I dont understand, why would you use a number fo like 40?