Code:
alias formatnick {
var %nick
if ($1 == nick) %nick = NiCK
elseif ($1 == anothernick) %nick = AnotherNick
elseif ($1 == supercoolguy) %nick = SuperCoolGUY
else %nick = $1
return %nick
}
Put that in remote and now you can use it as a function, $formatnick($nick)

Same idea for the other thing

Code:
alias getstuff {
 var %rch = $rand(1,667),%pre,%char
 if (%rch == 1) {
    %pre = Dark Sun
    %char = Gwyndolin
  }
  elseif (%rch == 2) {
     %pre = Black Dragon
     %char = Kalameet
  }
 elseif () {

  }
return %char %pre
}
and then $getstuff return %char as the first word and %pre as the rest, so in your script you would use something like var %stuff $getstuff,%char $gettok(%stuff,1,32),%pre $gettok(%stuff,2-,32)

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