Of going into a chat room invisibly?
Sometimes if I'm seeing if a mates about it would be better to go in invisibly then just leave if she isn't about.
You can only, /whois [color:red]nickname[/color] from outside a channel you cannot join and be invisible.
Eamonn.
u can always change your nickname to something they wouldn't recognize you by. don't forget to change your personal info. or easier.. just have a seperate mirc for specifically that task.
what you are seeking is a feature of Unreal IRCD but it's only found in the older versions i believe. in which case you would have to have special "oper" flags to accomplish that task. but try this and what was said above
You could try:
/who #channelname
which should give you a list of the nicks in that channel without joining it. The only drawback to this is that if people set themselves +i (which i believe means "invisible") then they may not be listed in the /who listing. In that case you could your friend to not set themselves +i (its the "Invisible Mode" checkbox in the mIRC connection settings).
Idea 2 ("i shoulda thought of that sooner!"): Do a /whois on your friend's nick and see if the channel is listed.
there are only a few IRCd's where this can be done... one of which is PTLink but only for services root through services RAW command...
so not something for the global public